Home study completion is in sight!

We have completed two home study visits, with two on the calendar.  I have just a few more pieces of paper to get to the social worker and we're done with the home study paperwork.  Two of those pieces of paper are medical forms for Matt & I.  We have appointments next week with the doctor.  You know what's cool and it's not the weather?  (not funny, I know)  The doctor's office had scheduled appts later in July, saying there were no appts sooner.  I called the nurse, who likes me (go figure) and is an adoptive mom herself.  I explained that I really needed sooner appts so we could get this thing moving.  She fit us in next week!  Whoever's praying on our behalf, thank you!  Keep the prayers coming these next couple of weeks that everything (especially medicals) will go smoothly, no surprises, no obstacles. 

Ramblings about our vacation and what's ahead

I would like to give you a well written, concise, beautiful picture of our trip to Orlando.  I'm afraid if you're going to get that, it'll have to come from my husband.  I'm going to give you random, not in any particular order, thoughts, funnies, advice, etc.

• GPS units are so cool!  We had so much less stress than long road trips of the past.
• Nintendo DS's and in vehicle DVD players are wonderful entertainment for the kids.
• Florida is SO STINKIN' hot in the summer.  I think the humidity is like 125%.  And yes, it did rain every afternoon.
• My kids are great travelers.  We spent a total of approximately 40 hours in the car in the last week and we had minimal whining and groaning (most of what we did have was from me).
• If you enjoy people watching, DisneyWorld will totally entertain you. 
• The Magic Kingdom is not the happiest place on earth as advertised.  Courtney told me one day she thought we were the only family in the park not trying to tear each other's eyes out. 
• Having a good time is usually the result of making a choice to have a good time!
• We saw some people who totally confirmed some stereotypes.  We stood in line with a family (grandparents, parents, kids) that had to be from New Jersey.  We actually saw them several times one day.  They were yelling at each others quite colorfully every time we saw them.  On the other hand, the most polite people we experienced were British. One British gentleman actually insisted that I get in front of him in line. 
• I love the It's a Small World ride.  I don't care how corny anyone else thinks it is.
• I am OLD and my favorite rides at DisneyWorld are still Winnie the Pooh, Peter Pan's Flight, and the Haunted Mansion.
• My husband is so awesome.  Why, you ask?  He went to a conference every day and wasn't even jealous of the fun we were having.  He truly was happy because we were having fun.
• My husband is so awesome.  Why, you ask?   We teased him relentlessly this week about him going to a geek conference with all the other computer geeks.  He took it quite well.
• New Smyrna Beach has white sand and great surf.
• No amount of sun screen will keep Courtney from getting burned on a white sand beach.
• No amount of water and rough surf will scare Cassidy.
• When a manatee swims between me and my children in the ocean, it scares me badly!  Especially when I read that this particular beach has reported LOTS of shark attacks.
• Sand sticks to everything.
• Florida is so stinkin' hot!
• When your cousin Sherry at www.mickeystravel.com/sherry gives you advice about how to maneuver DisneyWorld, you should do what she says.
• There are lines to get in line at DisneyWorld.
• Courtney can sing "O Canada" using nothing but meow's. 
• Everything in Orlando costs significantly more than it does in Oklahoma.
• The Renaissance hotel is really fancy and nice and enjoyable.  Thank you to my hubby's employer!
• Corky's BBQ in Memphis, TN is really yummy.
• Despite heat and crowds, the girls and I really like DisneyWorld, Magic Kingdom being our favorite.
• Everybody looks fun when wearing mouse ears.
• To make it easier to have a good time at Disney, stay at a Disney resort and go in January (did I mention it was hot).  We spent a lot of time in transit, but the hotel didn't cost us anything, so I'm not complaining.
• Cassidy does not trust me enough to choose rides because she was sure she wouldn't survive riding Splash Mountain. (She made it). 
• When Courtney was bothering Cassidy, Cassidy looked at me and said, "Do you see what I have to live with?" 

Okay, I warned you it was random.  We just got home a few hours ago and I'm tired ;) 

On the adoption front...we have a home study visit on Wednesday evening this week.  We are have a bunch of paperwork to complete between now and then.  I think I'll start tomorrow afternoon when I've had some sleep so it won't be random also. 

I am so grateful for a long road trip that was so completely uneventful.  I am VERY grateful for a wonderful time to enjoy my family and have fun with them without being interrupted by work or chores!

Strange Mixture of Excitement and Guilt

We are finally head long into the adoption process!

We have had one home study visit and have the next two scheduled.  I have adoption paperwork all over my desk and all over my computer.  I have a giant 3 ring binder tabbed and ready to try to keep everything organized.  I have checklists for my checklists.  We are so excited to be making head way.

At the same time, we are right now in Orlando, Florida.  Matt started a new job in March and they told him pretty quickly they wanted him to attend the TechEd Conference in Orlando in June.  We talked about how hard it would be for him to go to Orlando and leave us home.  Then we started talking about what an opportunity it was to take the girls on a great vacation.  That’s where our conversations about the whole idea got complicated.  You see, we’ve been trying to save money to finance the adoption. I have been working a part time job to help with money for the adoption.  We have received gifts from others to help finance the adoption.  Knowing this, is it right to go on a vacation?

We talked about it, thought about it, prayed about it.  Here was our conclusion…we have two awesome daughters who have already made some sacrifices.  One - we have traveled very little since returning from China in 2005.  Two – money hasn’t flowed their way very freely lately.  There will be sacrifices in the future that will outweigh those.  We have requested a special needs child.  He will most likely need surgery, physical therapy, or some other kinds of special medical attention.  This means time and money of the parents flowing that direction.  A new child in the family is always an adjustment, but one who speaks another language and has no idea who you are or what’s going on exactly is huge.  Our conclusion – this trip is a great gift to give our girls.

So, in conclusion of the vacation rant, Matt’s company is financing a good chunk of this “vacation” for the girls.  Since he will be attending the conference, they are paying our driving mileage, our hotel, and Matt’s food.   We would not even have considered this otherwise.  I don’t think I’m justifying this.  I think it’s taking advantage of an opportunity to invest some time and money into our girls before things go a little crazy for a while.  I certainly hope that those of you who have invested in our upcoming adoption will understand.  I also pray that you know how much you are appreciated.  We don’t take anyone’s contribution lightly. 

For those of you who have prayed us to this point in the adoption process, thank you and please keep praying.  We are in the fast lane and need God’s protection and provision in so many ways.  I worked on adoption paperwork in the car on the way down and have more I can do on the way home!

Love and thanks, Martha

Pity parties are so unbecoming

This morning, alone in my warm house, while my sweet husband was working and my precious healthy children were attending school, I caught myself having a personal little pity party.  I specialize in these.  I'm good at them.  I won't be too transparent on this one.  It's complicated what brought it on, and no one would probably comprehend the inner workings of my brain anyway.  But to sum it up, I was doing doing a chore that I consider unpleasant and meanwhile thinking of the things I wanted to be doing but couldn't because our money tree is not blooming properly.  I was feeling sorry for poor, pitiful me.  After all, I'm sure I'm the only one in the world in this situation today (funny, huh?)! 

THEN.....that still small voice.  "You are blessed beyond measure!  Most people in the world don't have to perform the chores you do, that's correct, but that's because they don't live in such luxury."  Then reality finally starting kicking in.  How many people in this world would love to have enough clothing, water, electricity to do laundry like I do?  I shift through my closet daily spouting that I have nothing to wear, mostly because I'm "over nourished."  I'm reworking my budget because I have to pay a speeding ticket that I got while driving my dinged up, making weird noises, mini-van - but I didn't have to walk my kids to school.

Here's a few stats I found. 

At least 80% of humanity lives on less than $10 a day.

According to UNICEF, 22,000 children die each day due to poverty.

Nearly a billion people entered the 21st century unable to read a book or sign their names.

Almost two in three people lacking access to clean water survive on less than $2 a day, with one in three living on less than $1 a day.

In 1998, $17 billion was spent on pet food in the US and Europe, while 1 million of the 2.2 billion children in the world are in poverty

So yes, I do scrub my own toilets.  My kids haven't been to Disney World.  I've never been on a cruise.  I don't shop at Neiman Marcus.  I'm sure I'd be thinner if I had a chef and a personal trainer.  Am I deprived?  I only think so when I'm being ridiculous.  Now, I know no one else reading this blog has ever had such horrible pity party pouts.  But I wanted to admit one of my biggest weaknesses mainly so the next time I give in to such stupidity, I will have this to come back and read.  In the words of Nicole Nordeman, "We are blessed beyond what we could ever dream, in abundance or in need."  Gratitude.  That's the cure.  Thank you God for salvation in you, my wonderful husband of 23 years, my precious healthy girls, my family and friends, my warm house, and on and on and on....



Transparent or not?

I haven't been blogging very consistently.  Sorry.  I have to admit that I've struggled with what to say.  Some of my friends have been so kind to ask, "How's the adoption going?"  I fear they won't ask anymore because of the weird look I get on my face right before I start stammering out an inadequate answer.  You see, I feel like from the moment we said yes to God, we've had one thing after another thrown our way to keep us from progressing toward the child we are sure God has for us. 

A dear friend and fellow adoptive mom shared something with me that I want to pass along.  I think it's a good perspective.  In fact, there is enough I want to put out there that I will share in two different blog entries.  This is the first installment.  In my wise friend's words...

"What if the Lord wants us to be totally transparent, especially in the struggles of adoption? You've started those steps with your blog, but maybe there is more. The health issues, the money issues.... I firmly believe that only those who have walked the adoption walk realize what a mind numbing, faith building, inadequate feeling that going through an adoption is.

First, there are all those very personal questions you have to answer for the home study. They require you to pick apart your feelings that you've kept to yourself all your life. They dig into relationship issues that would be much easier to hold close to your heart and share them with strangers who will document them and keep them ready to be pored over forever. And they go over your health records and make you feel like you've been a borderline failure because your blood pressure has to be controlled with meds, you are not the perfect size, or even that your hormones need a little tweaking for you to be your optimal self. And all these personal things are someone else's business. I can think of no other reason to open ourselves to that except for the sake of a child that has no one to call their own."

I find myself wondering how transparent I want to be.  I have to lay out the good, bad, and the ugly to the social workers.  No choice.  Do I want to lay it all out for friends, family, acquaintances, cyberspace to see?  You know, I don't think for me it's worth it honestly.  I'm a pretty private person.  But what if laying it all out there will help someone else to see what adoption is all about?  What if people will see what it's all about and commit to pray for us and others who have a heart for adoption?  What is one person decides God's calling them to adopt a precious child?  What if someone will read this and call asking to donate $30,000?  Okay, that probably won't happen, but what if it did?  What if someone has $1,000,000 they want to donate to a fund to help families with adoption expenses?  What if???  God's a great big God!

So in an attempt at transparency, here are the challenges we face right now in this adoption journey.

1 ~ money. We need about $4600 to start. We've had some very gracious people donate money toward this goal, and words are not enough to express our thanks. I want you all to know that that money is safetly tucked in an account dedicated solely to our adoption fund. I know where every cent has come from and where it is. We have also been attempting to put away money toward this goal ourselves. Seems like so many times we get ready to put money in there, life happens and gets in the way.

2 ~ I have some health issues that have shown up lately. Don't worry ~ I'm okay really, just every little thing threatens to throw a bump in the road to approvals in the world of international adoption. I am trying to get some things under control there before we do medical checks.

3 ~ Family issues. My mom has been in the hospital since the first weekend of December. She's had one crisis after another, which has kept me busy going back and forth to the hospital a lot. Matt's dad has health issues that require his time and attention frequently as well.

I don't think I'm complaining, just explaining.

So my conclusion?  I'll keep sharing, considering and praying carefully what to say here and what to keep private.  Please keep asking how it's going.  It's a great encouragement to know that this journey is on someone else's heart besides ours.  We haven't forgotten.  We're still praying.  We're still confident in God's call. 

~Martha

And the winner is...

 In our non-scientific yet as random as we know how to be method...we choose our winner!

Thank you to everyone who posted on Facebook, followed our blog, posted on your blog, and/or put our button on your blog.  We completely believe that God is going to provide for our needs.  Look for more exciting give aways in the future.

Morgan ~ message us with your t-shirt size and we'll get you fixed up.

Giving some stuff away!

Here's the deal.  We need to broaden our blog readership in a big way.   So we want to reward you for helping us.  This package - 1 of our custom adoption t-shirts, 1 copy of Matt's book "When You Come Home" and one copy of "Lovesongs and Lullabyes" can be yours!  Here's how.

1 chance for simply becoming a follower on our blog
1 chance for doing a facebook post referencing our blog
2 chances for putting our blog button on your blog
2 chances for sharing on your blog

Please email us at mmeadors23@yahoo.com or send us a facebook message to let us know you've done these things so we can give you credit.
We will be randomly selecting a name on November 14.  Let's get this party started!